Saman Khazani, LMFT

Saman Khazani, LMFT

The wound is where the light enters. Like all of us, I’ve had my own experience with suffering, much of it beginning in my childhood years. Coping with a neurological condition, school bullying, painful family dynamics, and a range of physiological conditions, have led me on a lifelong journey of finding peace within chaos.

Naturally, I became a highly feeling-oriented person, who relied on my sensitivity and intuitive function to guide me through my suffering, and to create meaningful connections. The most meaningful connection is the one we have with ourselves. I’ve developed a deep and rich inner relationship, that I continue to harvest and grow. This inner relationship was a gift offered to me — one which I would like to share. As Rumi says, “You are the fruit, as well as the tree it grows on.”

I like to challenge the idea that you are lacking something that I possess. We are all human, and it is important that I make known my own fallibility from the beginning of our therapeutic relationship. In this way, I am not here as someone more enlightened, but rather someone who is walking beside you on your road to becoming a more conscious individual, seeking to be seen and feel empowered. I do my best to treat and approach myself the way I would someone in my office. Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I struggle, sometimes I surprise myself.

Naturally, I became a highly feeling-oriented person, who relied on my sensitivity and intuitive function to guide me through my suffering, and to create meaningful connections. The most meaningful connection is the one we have with ourselves. I’ve developed a deep and rich inner relationship, that I continue to harvest and grow. This inner relationship was a gift offered to me — one which I would like to share. As Rumi says, “You are the fruit, as well as the tree it grows on.”

I like to challenge the idea that you are lacking something that I possess. We are all human, and it is important that I make known my own fallibility from the beginning of our therapeutic relationship. In this way, I am not here as someone more enlightened, but rather someone who is walking beside you on your road to becoming a more conscious individual, seeking to be seen and feel empowered. I do my best to treat and approach myself the way I would someone in my office. Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I struggle, sometimes I surprise myself.

Outside of the therapy room I like to stay engaged in different activities. I have been given that opportunity and see it as a gift, and even a responsibility. I’m definitely a jokester. Laughter to me is the saving sense, so any chance to see a comedy show or share laughter with family and friends is special to me. From time to time I write my own Rumi inspired poetry. I’ve dabbled in improv, sketch comedy, acting, and have been learning a new instrument (The Iranian Tar) that has connected me with my roots and inner muse in a very meaningful way. I get a rush out of random acts of kindness. I love to be barefoot when possible, jump in any body of water, and find travel (if accessible) is one of the fastest routes to empathy. There’s more, but for now, let’s turn to you.

Integrative. Balanced. Messy. Human. These words resonate deeply with my core philosophy. You are a unique individual (though part of a collective) and deserve a unique approach to your particular psyche. I use an integrative approach, drawing from a wide range of psychological principles and orientations, bringing in each as needed. You are not a robot! My approach to you is not mechanistic in nature. I focus on meeting you where you are at, taking into account the unique constellation of life experiences and psychological symbols that make you YOU.

First and foremost is holding space and empathy for your life experience. What is the weight you are carrying in this moment and lifetime? I really want to make space for your story, in all its light and darkness. People tell me that I offer a warmth and tenderness that makes them feel safe to share their deepest feelings and memories without feeling judged. This touches me deeply, as I do set the intention to create a space where you can tell me virtually ANYTHING. When you share the parts of yourself you often disown, or imagine others will find unworthy or inferior, I don’t think to myself “What is wrong with this person!” I think, “What is their deeper need and how can they be conscious of it?” More than anything I wonder to myself how that quality lives in me. This is in the spirit of keeping the therapeutic process away from any hierarchal structure, and moving towards connection and a relatability in our humanness.

While I pull from different modalities, I have been heavily influenced by Psychodynamic thought, Jungian to be specific. I like to focus on your unconscious life. We will aim to unroot/make conscious whatever is causing you distress deep inside. Paying attention to your dream life is a big part of this. Sometimes we will focus on the experience in your body. Your body has a sacred language. How it wants to express itself, and what it holds onto is part of what creates tension in our lives. Listening to your body and making room for your body to be accepted in its instinctual nature is part of what I believe leads to a greater sense of peace and harmony. We will also explore your early childhood experiences and how they live with you today. So much of how we exist in the world stems from early childhood, and having a grasp of these behaviors and attachment styles and where they come from is the first step towards change, but also towards self-compassion and acceptance. We will focus on how you communicate, as much discomfort can stem from a difficulty in locating and articulating your own personal truth.

My work is honest and direct. I find it’s important to have a good mixture of nurturing and challenging. I will gently challenge you to see parts of yourself and your behaviors that you may not be aware of. I feel that much of our own suffering stem from the systemic issues in our world. That being said, as we work together, I will almost always gently bring you back to a place that allows you to take responsibility in the areas of your life you feel stuck. In my experience, the road to empowerment is through awareness of our own shadows. In this way we feel less like the victims in our story, even when the world is being unkind to us. These are not always fun things to acknowledge, and you may meet them with some resistance. But the result of such work has the potential to leave you feeling more free in your mind & body. I like to be imaginative with the therapeutic space. We all have an idea of what therapy is “supposed to” look like, but I’m open to different frameworks (for instance, going on walks).

Underlying all of our work together is a basic respect and appreciation for the moment we share in the room, where you’ve entrusted me with what is sacred for you. I look forward to the possibility of us connecting, and walking beside you on whatever journey you are currently on. I’d be honored for the opportunity.